The need for constructive discussion on tariqa problems

The last few weeks have seen an upsurge in attacks on shaikhs on various blogs, particularly on Umar Lee’s site and Salafi Burnout. It all started with Umar’s post about so-called Rand Institute Muslims and particularly Shaikh Hamza Yusuf, but the “discussion” quickly moved on to the subject of Shaikh Muhammad al-Ya’qoobi and Shaikh Nuh Keller, with a number of angry messages left on those two blogs, and a few on mine back in January and early February, mainly criticising the way Shaikh Nuh and some of those around him handle the personal affairs of students in Kharabsheh, the district of Amman where the shaikh’s zawiya and the Qasid Arabic school are located, and which is home to a number of western students.

The accusations included that Shaikh Nuh, or those around him, encourage divorce among their followers, to the extent that there had been some thirty couples divorcing in the past year or so, and that some were on their third marriage, among other things as summed up in this extract from an article posted a little over a month ago at “Salafi Burnout”:

Nuh Ha Meem Keller is hated by many because he is a sufi. This is wrong. He should be despised because he is a cult leader who has ruined the lives of many people. His aqeedah is not the big problem. Spying, money scams, sex scandals, a very high divorce rate, ruined families, children abandoned by their fathers, are all part of a normal day with Nuh Keller. His wife and her friend decide who marries, who divorces, and when and how. Women who are divorced are put through a gossip campaign to ruin them in their hometowns. They are notorious with the sufis for the number of people they have driven to insanity in their underground zikr cells and with their mind games.

Their friend Ms Hartford is supposed to be the premiere marriage counselor and yet she’s on her third marriage. That passes for success in Keller world. Women are taught to submit completely to their husbands and to sacrifice their dignity for his pleasure. If you leave Keller or piss off his wife and her friend, you are shunned. This means that you lose all of your friends, some people have lost their jobs, and they spread gossip about you all over the world. A favorite gossip is that you are crazy. Keller spreads poison about the other shaykhs of the sunni Muslims, saying that he is one of the only true shaykhs.

“Salafi Burnout”, a term popularised in the mid-1990s by Abdul-Hakim Murad, referring to fanatical “salafis” giving up and becoming irreligious, is a blog which largely consists of some guy’s bitter rantings about Muslims, and although he started out by reposting material from Umar Lee’s blog about the “salafi” movement in early 2008, by the end of last year he had moved on to mocking hadeeth and he has joined in the Sufi-bashing which started on Umar’s blog with some gusto. The post from which that extract came has 195 comments at the time I wrote this; a second post attacking Shaikh Nuh has 14 (two of them mine). What all of them have in common is that they are posted by people who do not give names - at least, not full names - and that the accusations are usually unspecific.

For example, one of those who posts repeatedly calls him- or herself “Ex Kharabsha” and gave this example of his alleged “antics”:

It was at a non tariqah event in the UK that was organised by Muslims that he was invited to where he and another person were acting quite ridiculously in public view. It could have been 2006, not 2007 or 2008.

So, no place, no description of the event, no proper description of the behaviour, and he or she can’t even pin down what year. What case is there to answer?

Some of the claims are not even about things which are unlawful in Islam. It’s not unlawful to have two failed marriages; it’s just a sad fact of life and that is why divorce is lawful in Islam. The claim that sister Hidaya Hartford has supposedly said that she would leave her husband if he took a second wife, even if it’s true, is irrelevant as this is also perfectly valid, as long as it was written into their marriage contract. Polygamy has always been a common cause of Muslim marriages breaking down, and I cannot count the number of times I had been told by sisters, while discussing possible marriage with them, that they wouldn’t tolerate it. A few years ago I saw a post on a blog by a Muslim sister castigating men who threaten their wives with it as a means of shutting them up or winning an argument. It causes a lot of distress to some women. No doubt some of these complainers (particularly the women) would be complaining more if sidi Ashraf did take another wife and Ustadha Hedaya just had to put up with it.

A lot of the other complaints are not valid, in my opinion. The rules on hijaab, particularly as regards female tariqa members who are expected to wear niqaab when in Syria and Jordan, are things which should be known before you leave home. Many of the women want to wear hijab, and in a community of religious Muslims, some of whom face pressures not to cover when in their home countries, it is entirely appropriate that proper hijab is not up for discussion. As for Shaikh Hamza Yusuf not speaking out despite supposedly disapproving of the Sufi tariqas, Shaikh Hamza is associated with the Hadrami Ba’Alawis who dispensed with the bay’ah system found elsewhere in the Muslim world several centuries ago. If he had found reason to disapprove of Shaikh Nuh’s behaviour, then surely he would say so rather than whisper it in people’s ears so that they could pass the whispers on.

I should add that there is only so much that Shaikh Nuh, and even Ashraf, Hedaya and Umm Sahl (Shaikh Nuh’s wife) can do to run the lives of a whole village full of students. The students are adults, after all, and back home they would not have Shaikh Nuh, or anyone else, looking over their shoulder. The community is probably too big, a product of the fact that it is the first stop for any English-speaking Muslim wishing to take a Sufi tariqa; the number of shaikhs, of any tariqa, who speak good English is not that many, and the number of well-known ones is probably in the lower single figures. It is much less easy for students to get quality time with the shaikh than it was earlier on, even when I took the tariqa in 2001. I should add that such contact is less important in the Shadhili tariqa than in some other orders, such as the Naqshbandiyya, in which the personality of the shaikh is an important focus. The important thing is the wird, and people have progressed in the tariqa while living thousands of miles away from the shaikh, and even without telephones and the Internet.

I am inclined towards giving the shaikh the benefit of the doubt, not least because nobody has seen fit to give full names, and because details of things which have happened have been rather vague. I still have some suspicion that some of the accusations are coming from “salafi” mischief-makers, not least because some of the comments posted to my blog came from Calgary, a notorious “salafi” hotbed with little or no tariqa activity. Still, the tone and content of some of them, and the use of words like “tariq” (rather than the usual feminine form, tariqa), suggest that some of them are from genuinely disgruntled ex-tariqa followers. The claims about police harassment of students is something that my sources also corroborate, although that is not Shaikh Nuh’s fault. In the past, Amman may have been an ideal base; today, it is much more overcrowded than it was in the 1990s, due to the presence of so many refugees.

If this is so, we need to talk about this in a civilised fashion rather than posting slander from behind pseudonyms on other people’s blogs. We can’t lecture non-Muslims about “civility” when they break our taboos about depicting the Prophet (sall’ Allahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) and then be highly uncivil when talking to or about each other on a public forum (and non-Muslims do read them, and even contribute as I’ve seen at “Salafi Burnout”). Most people who take the tariqa from Shaikh Nuh, or anyone else, do so because they want to join a relatively progressive religious community which is free of Deobandi-Bareilawi baggage and yet maintains Islamic orthodoxy, and would not want to remain in a circle which was cult-like, let alone one in which people were being abused or having advantage taken of them.

If there are serious problems in the community at Kharabsheh, they need to be discussed openly rather than with accusations made in a shrill fashion on a blog run by a bitter ex-salafi. After all, the traditionalist-revivalist movement associated with Shaikh Nuh has done a lot of valuable work for Islam; it offers religious practice and orthodoxy while accommodating some modern attitudes and customs, and turning its back on old, pointless disputes. It cannot be allowed to break down amid bitterness and recrimination. These problems, if they are real, need to be rectified, not allowed to fester.

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  • LeedsLad

    Being a Muslim is very easy, but the difficulties arise when people begin to open Islam Shops all over the place. I am tired of Islamic Bookshop, Islamic Clothes shop, Islamic taxis etc. Please, just provide the right services to all people while leaving yourself and others in peace.

    Causing headaches and disturbing more than one or more persons just contradicts the spirits of Islam. Stick to the five pillars of Islam; that is all.

  • Abdullah

    LOL… I can’t believe what I just read! There is no doubt about it that these accusations are the works of shaytan and the enemies of Islam. Case closed!

  • Abdul Malik

    Aslaamu alaykum

    Many of these ppl are looking for attention. They enjoy controversy and are looking for ppl to react to there falsified accusations. They have actually thrown the bait and brother you have fallen for it. Don’t waste your time debating with them because it will only increase them in there pleasure. The best method is to Ignore them and Inshallah Allah (swt) will decide on the day of judgment to what they say. May Allah (swt) Guide us All. Ameen

  • mastur

    The fact that they not only seek to prove and substantiate their claims, but also refuse to identify where they stand regarding the conditions of a true Shaykh, the nature of the Shaykh/Murid relationship, and the nature of tarbiya/mujahada al-nafs, shows that the are insincere.

    They are not the only people who know some of the problems in Kharabshah and they are not the only ones who witnessed events. The only difference is that their disgruntlement and “jadedness” prevents them from being a bit more objective.

    I mean, c’mon, if these people read books like al-Anwar al-Qudisiya (and I asked one of them here about their opinion regarding its contents and the genre of Shaykh/Murid literature in general but received no response)they will have a heart attack!

    That being said, much of the claims made against Tariqs in general and Shaykh Nuh’s Tariq in particular are equally applicable to Islam as a whole. Yes,there are some murids who are a bit “off”, but subhanallah, how many “off” Muslims have we all met and yet are not affiliated with any Tariq?

    As a matter of fact, there are a couple of people who Shaykh Nuh instructed to return home from Jordan because they had issues with bipolar and required meds.

  • http://getoutlines.wordpress.com Safiya Outlines

    Salaam Alaikum,

    To be honest, I’m not sure you should spend so much time defending these people.

    I have a friend who is in Sheikh Nur’s tariqa. She is a convert and looking to get married…and so are you. So I mentioned your blog to her with a glowing recommendation.

    After looking at it, she said that the blog contravened the tariqa teachings, e.t.c, e.t.c.

    I find that really worrying, as I can’t find anything wrong with your blog whatsoever and some other things that’s she’s told me about the tariqa, I find very disturbing, such as the ideal role for women staying at home as much as possible e.t.c.

    Allahu Alim, but I do believe Ex Kharabsha and I’m by no means anti-Sufi or anti tariqa.

  • Indigo Jo

    السلام عليكم

    What did your friend say she found on here that contravened the tariqa’s teachings?

  • http://getoutlines.wordpress.com Safiya Outlines

    Salaam Aalikum,

    Just the blog in general. She felt it was unacceptable for a murid and wondered if you’d been following the sheikh correctly.

    To be honest, I didn’t go too much into it with her because I was too stunned. She’s really happy in the tariqa and has found it to be beneficial for her, but from what she’s told me, I’m starting to have real concerns.

  • Lima

    I believe Ex Kharabsha as well, we cannot just dismiss their experiences. Salafiburnout is actually a good site in that people can open up and a discussion can occur, but obviously adab should be observed which doesnt always happen. What is the benfit that they expose their identity, they will still be dismissed.

  • Ilyas

    Salaam ‘alaikum,

    Sheikh Nuh was once asked after one of the latifiyya lessons if he endorsed or was affiliated with a facebook group called “The Shadhili Tariqa” or something like that.

    His reply, which I’m paraphrasing, was that the whole concept of websites dedicated to telling the world what’s new in one’s life (like myspace, blogs, facebook) was unproductive vis a vis a person’s suluk. He mentioned that the origin of such endeavors is usually the nafs, wanting to say “look at me, look at all the great things i’m up to this week!” Obviously that’s not everyone’s intention, though an honest look at the Muslim blogoshpere tends to bear out that that is the case in most instances (with notable exceptions). That’s probably what the sister was referring to, wallahu t’ala alim.

  • mastur

    Lol I just re-read my own comments. Sorry folks, im getting over a cold and sleep deprivation. I meant to say that the fact that these people are requested to prove their claims, but they are unable or unwilling…

    Regarding what the sister said, yes, that is an issue. There are some Murids who are a bit judgmental. They take some of the guidelines of the Shaykh and apply it to others critically in a “holier than thou” attitude. What’s new? There are tons of non-tariq following Muslims who do that too.

    The internet is not the best medium for discussing these issues.

  • http://www.themuslimah.com Umm Layth

    Bismillah

    as salamu ‘alaykum

    I think the Sheikh would tell us to ignore these fools who are spreading lies and causing fitnah and who refuse to come out with their real identities.

    ///I find that really worrying, as I can’t find anything wrong with your blog whatsoever and some other things that’s she’s told me about the tariqa, I find very disturbing, such as the ideal role for women staying at home as much as possible e.t.c.\

    Safiya, why do women fight the natural and default role that Allah has given them? Being homemakers, wives, and mothers, has always been a part of our fitrah and will remain a part of our fitrah no matter how much we fight it. Our children and society now face the consequences of our abandonment due to searching for our ‘own’ self satisfaction. We no longer find happiness in serving others. We must get paid to feel successful. We should only look around us to see how men are being treated thanks to the womens movement. What once was a right to vote has now become a disaster for families. If we truly want to be successful in life we must not fight was is natural and we must admit that fighting it has caused a whole hell of a lot of trouble for us.

  • http://getoutlines.wordpress.com Safiya Outlines

    Salaam Alaikum,

    Umm Layth - Respectfully, I feel there is a major difference between a women being a homemaker and a women not being allowed out of the house because her presence is a fitna.

    The latter is what my friend was told, with Yemen being held up as an example of an ideal society. Yemen of course, being like Saudi, a country where women cannot even go to the shops by themselves.

    There’s a big difference between fitra and subjugation.

    I could on about the the idealisation of certain Muslim societies above others, for example in many parts of the Muslim world, women have traditionally been agricultural workers, purdah did not and does not exist there.

    I could also mention that Westerners need to realise their privilege, as while they may long after a Yemeni lifestyle, they have the luxury of escape if they don’t like it anymore.

    We all know that away from the ideals, such a cloistered lifestyle leaves women at the mercy of their male relatives, they can treat her as they wish and they will often put their needs ahead of hers and that is putting it mildly.

  • mastur

    @Safiya Outlines:

    Judging from your comments you have obviously not been to Yemen. But beyond all that, the tariqa is voluntary. When someone makes a decision to join a Tariq it should be thought out properly and undertaken with prayful caution and intention. When committing to follow the tarbiya of a particular Shaykh, it is highly probable that the Shaykh will give commands or guidance to the Murids - men and women - that are hard on their nufus. After all, if we believe that our fiqh comes to us with fully intact chains all the way back to the Companions, it follows that the active and living Sufi tariqas come with intact chains, carrying within them a long history of spiritual training replete with techniques for breaking the ego.

    It is is mistake for non-tariq members (no matter what the Tariqa is) to think that Shaykh so-and-so’s orders are his declaration to the Umma entire. Conversely, it is a mistake to take the specific commands and guidance of one’s Shaykh and apply it to everyone - in the tariq or not.

    So what am I trying to say here? Im saying that if a Shaykh orders his female followers to wear Niqab that is fine. The niqab is most certainly not forbidden, and for many if not most, wearing it is a form of jihad al-nafs. After all, isnt that what a sufi tariq is supposed to be all about?

    What is strange and sad is that some people say that they want to find a Shaykh who can help them in their jihad al-nafs, so long as the Shaykh doesnt have any “harsh” commands (that go against the nafs).

  • http://getoutlines.wordpress.com Safiya Outlines

    Salaam Alaikum,

    Is it not strange how the directions are always harder on the nufus of the women?

    Tarim in Yemen is the area being spoken about. It is a known fact that women are not able to go out alone there. Female students are not encouraged to move there alone and those that move with their husbands are advised not to go to the shops alone for their own protection, as this not deemed acceptable in local society there.

    Finally, the major complaint against this tariqa is that marriages are interfered with. This is not the way of many Sufi sheikhs, most of whom avoid meddling in their murid’s marital lives.

    For as the Arab proverb goes, the man who comes between a husband and his wife, is like one between the onion and the skin, he’s left with nothing but stink.

  • http://www.themuslimah.com Umm Layth
    Salaam Alaikum, Umm Layth - Respectfully, I feel there is a major difference between a women being a homemaker and a women not being allowed out of the house because her presence is a fitna. The latter is what my friend was told, with Yemen being held up as an example of an ideal society. Yemen of course, being like Saudi, a country where women cannot even go to the shops by themselves.

    wa ‘alaykum as salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu

    Honestly Safiya, I’ve learned that what a murid says is not necessarily what the Sheikh has said. We are humans and we interpret things in many different ways. None of us are safe from our own bias.

    Sheikh Nuh does not forbid any woman from leaving her home. Proof needs to be brought for such a claim. The women in Kharabsheh go out, attend events, hang out with each other, run a school, and more.

    My husband shared with me that when the Sheikh visited Yemen he enjoyed his visit. Many have enjoyed their visits. Question: When did Sheikh Nuh say that Yemen was the ideal society? Is this on audio? Or is it mere interpretation of a murid or non-murid?

    It is also important to note that although Yemen, just like any other place, has its issues, women continue functioning, thriving, and they hold halaqahs, visit each other, raise children, and so on.

    There’s a big difference between fitra and subjugation.

    ‘Subjugation’ is a subjective term and one that is politically charged by feminists. What you may deem as subjugation the law may not. The best place for a woman is her home. Allah says in the Qur’an “and stay within your homes…” Of course, there will be those who will attempt to say that this was ONLY for the wives of Rasulullah (sallAllahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), not for us. Really? The Ummahat al Mu’mineen were the ideal model for us all.

    Even when it came to Salah (prayer) the Prophet (sallAllahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) said that the best place for a woman to do it in was her home. He said this time and time again. The most important fundamental part of a persons spiritual life, for a woman, is done within the home. What of the lesser functions?

    I could on about the the idealisation of certain Muslim societies above others, for example in many parts of the Muslim world, women have traditionally been agricultural workers, purdah did not and does not exist there.

    Islam and the idealization of Muslim societies isn’t based upon Muslims like you and I or whole sub cultures of the Muslim Ummah. Islam is based upon Law - The Qur’an and the Sunnah and those who we are obligated to ask - the people of ‘ilm. The four schools of thought are unanimous in saying that when there is the intermingling of the sexes, a woman is to cover her face and the men are commanded to lower their gaze. Safiya, purdah isn’t the concern of Islam. The concern of Islam is the ideal of Hijab and Allah spent so much time on it for a reason. If the women around the Prophet (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), who our Beloved Messenger called “khairun naas”, delegated so much time and concern to this ideal, then the importance is obvious for the ‘ideal’ society. It is important for us to acknowledge that our ideal society is Madinah during our Rasul’s time (sallAllahu ‘alayhi wa sallam). This was a society in which the ansari women ruled their husbands (bukhari).The ansari women demanded a day of education for themselves, clearly showing the rights given and guaranteed to them by the the law of Allah. It was a society where men and women took care of their flock, upheld their responsibilities, were sensitive to each others needs, where rights were given to whom they were due, where they cared for others, where women stayed home, although they also went out for needs. We truly can not find what they had in today’s time.

    I could also mention that Westerners need to realise their privilege, as while they may long after a Yemeni lifestyle, they have the luxury of escape if they don’t like it anymore.

    I think this is besides the point but, okay, sure, we have electricity and dishwashers, but what about all the consequences on our spirituality, our children, that come from living in the west? Is this all part of that luxury?

    We all know that away from the ideals, such a cloistered lifestyle leaves women at the mercy of their male relatives, they can treat her as they wish and they will often put their needs ahead of hers and that is putting it mildly.

    You don’t have to be isolated for that to occur. What has all this ‘freedom’ and ‘openness’ given us right here in the west? How are women treated here? I could also say that men in the west face much oppression of their own as well. Our boys are suffering, our men are suffering. It is said that behind every great man is a great woman. Where are the great women of our time? Families are being destroyed because women have decided that they want to seek happiness and fulfillment away from their homes. The west isn’t the answer either. The answer is Islam.

  • Abdullah

    Assalamu Alaykum everyone,

    I’ve done a little investigation on this matter and I found out some interesting “things” about those whom are spreading lies against Shaykh Nuh and others… Ex Kharabsha I have an idea who you are… I spoke with one of the Murids of Shaykh Nuh (Sidi Zahid ring a bell… you know Guyanese brother?) and I also know Sidi Ibrahim Kreps and Sidi Ismail (one of the SunniPath brothers from Mauritius currently residing in Jordan with his wife and children)… we have a pretty good idea who you and your buddies are… and man you got some series issues… I’m not going to go into details and embarrass you but at least alhamdulillah it has been clarified for me.

    As for what everybody else needs to know is that the people that are spreading these lies have personal to psychological issues and instead of dealing with their issues they find it easy to find scape goats… I know some stuff that I don’t want to disclose but I think this puts to rest the lies that these mentally ill people are spreading… tariqah is not a walk in the park, its for those whom seriously want to kill their nafs and become awliya and ‘aarifeen… there is not room for the nafs/ego, you can I either choose to be a turkey or soar like an eagle, it’s your choice.

  • http://www.themuslimah.com Umm Layth
    Is it not strange how the directions are always harder on the nufus of the women?

    How would you know this? Firstly, you aren’t a murid. Secondly, we aren’t men and are only aware of our own struggles. I do believe that the reason it seems hard for us is because we have a lot of baggage due to the feminist movement affecting our lives in a lot of aspects. How many women can’t even accept that Hijab is a part of the Law? Such a basic fundamental rejected. What about the rest? We rebel against our own fitrah and our own deen because we feel it isn’t the “right” interpretation. We must take responsibility and stop pointing the finger at men. It’s always about the men.

    Finally, the major complaint against this tariqa is that marriages are interfered with. This is not the way of many Sufi sheikhs, most of whom avoid meddling in their murid’s marital lives.

    This is unfair. When people go to a person to ask for advice, help, and complain about their marital life, it is not the Sheikh ‘interfering’ but being asked. Now, to be fair, Sheikh Nuh doesn’t like to deal with the marital issues and has forwarded the murids to others who may be of help, with more experience, if the murids decides they want to.

    I don’t like the fitnah you are trying to start Safiya. You have accepted the manipulations without a need for further clarification and have shown your contempt for someone you don’t even know with your choice of proverb. La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah.

  • http://getoutlines.wordpress.com Safiya Outlines

    Salaam Alaikum,

    I knew it would come to this and I am saddened.

    I do not feel that I started any fitnah. I am not a fitnah monger, nor a hater, in real life or online. Certainly in blog-land, you will find very few people I have ever disputed with.

    I did not start this, I merely shared some concerns as anyone is entitled to do so. I do think there are particular issues with certain group mentalities across a wide spectrum of Muslims. I think we do need to discuss these issues.

    If you want to make this a “Who’s the better Muslim” thing, go ahead. I know my deen.

  • Lima

    Unbalanced people like Umm Layth tend to blow things out of proportion. Safiyah shared a story and you are already accusing her of creating “fitnah” and “contempt”. Your aim is to shut down any discussion by playing the pious muslim. You said once you were an extremist salafi, you have not changed.

  • http://www.themuslimah.com Umm Layth

    wa ‘alaykum as salam

    You brought up a concern and didn’t care to confirm if what was being said was twisted in any way, didn’t seek clarification. Why would you be concerned for anyone who takes the tariq under sheikh Nuh and why make a fuzz about a recommendation for women to stay at home and know their roles? Firstly, you aren’t sure if this is his opinion but are blindly following someone. Secondly, you are pointing the finger and trying to make it seem like Sheikh Nuh Keller is intentionally trying to start fitnah in marriages. We’re speaking of someone who is learned and has dedicated his life to learning and teaching. You decided to take the word of people who refuse to come out in the open with their real identities (I may know who one of them is may I add, almost sure). What of this isn’t fitnah? We here rumors and run with it. I don’t believe this is what our deen has taught us when Allah tells us to avoid suspicion.

  • Umm Layth
    If you want to make this a “Who’s the better Muslim” thing, go ahead. I know my deen.

    I was washing the dishes and I kept thinking about this statement. I thought yeah okay it’s just another one of those statements that is thrown when people like to run away from the points but I feel like this is what you are doing Safiya and what many have done in these discussions. C’mon, we have people here trying to belittle ‘ulema. Is this not a “who’s the better Muslim” thing?

  • http://getoutlines.wordpress.com Safiya Outlines

    Salaam Alaikum,

    Umm Layth I do not need to run away from anything. I feel you are twisting my words to suit your own purposes. Most of all, you seem to want to make this some kind of big battle, but it’s more complex then that.

    I’ve said my piece and I stand by every word. Had Yusuf been female, I would have relayed this to him privately, but as he is a non mahram, I felt it would be better to communicate publicly.

    Now I have to wash my own dishes.

  • http://www.seekingilm.com Abul Layth

    Salamu ‘alaykum Sidi Yusuf,

    I love you bro…

    was-salam, Abul Layth

  • http://www.ginnysthoughts.com Ginny

    Assalamu alaikum, I want to try to speak very carefully on this issue. Firstly, when the allegations first started coming out, I admittedly reacted pretty harshly. Not because I was in this particular tariqah, but because the blog on which these allegations were first being said was decidedly anti-tasawuf in the first place. However, the amount of people commenting, and the fact that everyone is saying the same thing, leads me to think that “something” is going on. And obviously, as I’m not there, I can’t say exactly what that “something” is, however, it ain’t good, whatever it is. And it bothers me that the defense seems to be along the lines of “these are just a bunch of disgruntled women with pms”, etc., and “oh they’re just mentally unstable”, etc., etc. And I’m not only referring to comments made on Yusuf’s blog but those made on the Salafi Burnout blog as well.

    I think it’s gone too far to close Pandora’s box and say “oh let’s just not saying anything because it’ll cause too much fitnah”, when the cat is already out of the bag so to speak. Someone needs to say something, either the murids, etc., need to refute these things in a better way than “women with pms or mental issues are just mad at us”, or someone who’s brave enough and is in a safe place needs to write a full and detailed expose on what is going on. And no, they may not have audio tapes, etc., but if even a hint of some of the accusations are even remotely true, women and children, especially, need to be protected from this. And if “these are just a bunch of liars” then those making this charge also need to prove their claim.

    Whatever “the truth” is, Inshallah, Allah makes it known so people can make a well-informed decision, because all we have to go on thus far is “he said she said”. And that can’t be good. I can see this from both sides, though, I know what it’s like to be abused and to not be believed, and I also know what it’s like to have false things said about you that you can’t easily refute. But some of the allegations made on both of these blogs are just mind-boggling and I can’t imagine any Muslim worth their salt overlooking them… Sodomy? Pornography? Etc. I’m shocked, not so much because of the allegations themselves but that people in some kind of power or authority just overlooked the sisters’ complaints. Why? As I said, if even some of this is true, there are big problems here. And that’s putting it mildly.

    Anyway, if I can so publicly come out initially against the initial claims, I can also publicly apologize and say I’m sorry! My bias of the website where these things initially appeared colored my judgment of the initial commentors who first voiced these allegations. So perhaps a first step would be to create a safe haven where people can get help and these sorts of thigns can be discussed, in an Islam-friendly, tasawuf-friendly, environment, where people’s very painful experiences won’t be used to mock Islam or tasawuf. I also had the feeling, when these things first surfaced, of “who can we trust”? People go to Shaykh Nuh and other scholars not because they’re some immature naive people, they go because these scholars supposedly know more than the people seeking them out for knowledge and guidance, and if these “scholars” are no better, or even worse, than the people who are coming to them for knowledge and guidance, then where do we, the common people, go for knowledge? Who do we trust? And this is why these sorts of sites seeking to “expose” scholars are so damaging, because in “exposing” people, and throwing dirt around for all to see, with no kinda proof, just for the sake of doing it, it’s not only damaging to one’s faith, it’s also damaging to one’s feelings of self-worth, I mean, you start to think that you can’t trust your own judgment regarding people. So I’m not saying that these allegations aren’t true, however, some sorta proof, if any, needs to be provided, or at least, good adab should be observed and people need to understand if there’s any shock or defensiveness on people’s part when these sorts of things are brought out. I can speak for myself and say that it’s all been a lot for me to take in and process, not because I’m some naive person, but because all we knew of many of these scholars, were that they were trying to do good work for Islam and Muslims, and since I don’t really have an attachment to any particular community, I don’t know all of the “dirt” on people, so to hear all of this is really shocking. Because I tend to think the best of people, unless I am shown differently.

    But what bothers me about “exposing” certain scholars is that there’s no stated goal, except to well “expose” people. What is being achieved by “exposing” people? Are these women going to get the help they deserve? The protection they need to speak out or the assistance needed to start their lives over? And when will it end? Salafi Burnout has taken to “exposing” every day people, not just scholars. I probably said some things 2, 3, 5 or 10 years ago that I’d never say today! And I’d sure not want someone digging up something I said just for tabloid fodder on their blog or just to make a point, especially when what I might have said years ago has nothing to do with me today. This whole thing has made me very careful about what I post online, what I say to people online, and who I talk to. It’s made me consider curtailing my online activity.

  • Ilyas

    Bismillah al-Rahman al-Rahim

    Salaam ‘alaikum Ginny.

    May Allah reward you for your sincerity and for having husn al-dhan with all the people involved in this… well, what ever it is.

    My own experience with Sheikh Nuh is very different from what these people have written and I think I know why. There are things which one can count on a Sheikh to do and there are things that one cannot. It is no one’s responsibility to ‘make’ others be good to one another. The most a Sheikh of tarbiyah can do is give the proper instructions. I, myself, once complained to Sheikh Nuh about a situation with my wife (who is not a murid). His advice: Don’t argue about the problem, go to bed earlier, spend less time on the internet, and be consistent with your dhikr. In other words, be a better Muslim and don’t dwell on what others may be doing wrong. Sheikh Nuh did not take my side or blame my wife, even though I’m a murid and she isn’t. In fact he put the onus on me to rectify the situation by addressing my shortcomings.

    As for those brothers who are being unjust, I’ve seen Sheikh Nuh advise the brothers harshly about their duties to their families. In fact he once stated explicitly that “some of you are angels at the majalis and a terror at home, such that your wife and children fear you when you come through the door. A person like that has no tasawwuf.” He also stated that “some people live near the sheikh but are no more than neighbors. They don’t listen. Until a person gets serious about their suluk, they will not benefit, no matter where they live.” But what can he do if people don’t listen? He is a Sheikh of tasawwuf, not the town sheriff. It’s not his job to kick down doors and arrest abusive husbands or to enforce alimony and child-support payments. The most he can be expected to do is give the right admonishment, which he does. Further, he regularly advises us men to not respond when provoked or angered, by our wives or others. So how is it misogynistic to give that same advice to women?

    One of the goals of the path is to be soft with others, even if they are unjust. And to see that it is not “so and so” who spoke ill of you or tripped you or dented your car, etc. Rather the path is to be aware that Allah, who only wants Good for us, creates every single thing at every single moment and that one must meet Allah’s Decree with patience.

    Divorce- The only time I’ve heard of Sheikh Nuh affirming a person’s decision to divorce is when remaining married is causing them harm to their deen. Period. Maybe there’s a lot more of that going on in Kharabsheh these days. I wouldn’t doubt it. But I do doubt that anyone here would recommend staying in a marriage that is spiritually harmful.

    As for the insults and accusations against other people in Kharabsheh, it just seems like a lot of petty gossip: “Umm al-Khayr said X about Fulana A and not to talk to Fulana B. She hates us women…” I mean, really. How old are these people? Furthermore, Sheikh Abd al-Rahman was the one who made Sidi Ashraf and Umm al-Khayr Sheikh Nuh’s muqadams. That was his decision, radhiAllahu anh, and that carries far more weight than the stories of anonymous people on a blog.

    Lastly, for those who were harmed by their husbands and others: No one is accountable for the actions of another. These things happen to Muslims and non-Muslims everyday and in every place. Blame the perpetrator and deal with him/her directly. Don’t count on their fathers/mothers, friends, cousins or Shiekhs to get you what you feel is just. That just doesn’t work and is unfair to those people who are being dragged into it (even if they tried to help before the situation deteriorated).

    May Allah forgive any errors in my words and shower blessings on the awliya, radhiAllahu anhum wa ankum.

  • Umm Layth

    Ameen

  • Umm Sulayman

    I saw this discussion only today, and was on the one hand saddened to see so much second- or even third-hand hearsay being written about Shaykh Nuh, none of which tallies with my 12 years of experience as his murid, but on the other hand cannot take such ‘rumours’ seriously, because no evidence, or even hard ‘facts’ are provided.

    At one level I can completely understand why the closeness and camaraderie of tariqa members can appear off-putting to others, who then see fallings out among such groups as vindications of their own discomfort. But truly, the reason why people take tariqas at all is because something in their hearts, souls, and (in the case of Shaykh Nuh’s tariq at least, whose metaphysical expositions are highly articulate, and draw one into a world of meanings with apparent ease) heads are moved by what they hear of his teachings. I have never met an individual who is as firm about religious orthodoxy based on the Qur’an, Sunna of the Blessed Messenger and the insights of the awliya and arifin through the ages, as Shaykh Nuh. Of course I am biased. But my critical judgement is not in anyway suspended when I mention these things: as a teacher by profession, I could not suspend it if I tried!

    Shaykh Nuh has maintained his own marriage over the decades by his and his wife’s mutual accommodation of each other’s needs. Thus he teaches us how to be better spouses by example as well as by his explicit teaching. On the subject of women working, he is progressive, if that is the right word: it was his advice that persuaded me to try to finish my PhD and look for a teaching job. As for interference in marriage, the only time I experienced this was when he wrote my husband a note requesting him to buy me flowers, a note that I later found and smiled about.

    As for blanket prescriptions, they are not really a part of the path, except for the individual to follow orthodox schools of fiqh and aqida; anything else that is supposed to be tariqa-wide is usually denoted as such. Shaykh Nuh does not generally address himself to non-murids, who need not concern themselves with his admittedly rigorous tarbiyya style since that is a matter between the murid and Allah Most High.

    Too many people come to the Shaykh, asking him to sort out their marital issues, their health problems (including mental!), financial worries, and all manner of difficulties relating to personal life. Yet he has always maintained that his role is to pass on the suluki teachings that were given to him at the hand of Shaykh Abd al-Rahman al-Shaghouri of Damascus. If one were to focus solely on the question of suluk, and take extraneous problems to appropriate professionals, then one would find the tariqa to be a refuge from the ills of the world. That, at least has been my experience. I feel deeply for those who are so wounded as to commit ghiba in this fashion, especially so against someone whose only concern is that the Most High be pleased with him. In that sense, none of this affects the Shaykh. Yet I felt compelled to come here and at least try to set the record straight.

    Yours in faith Umm Sulayman

  • maghi85

    there is nothing that stops women from going to the market in Tarim, Yemen. Any one who has lived there would attest to it and there is nothing wrong in advising female-students-of-knowledge from not going to the market unless necessary.

  • http://www.seekerofthesacred.wordpress.com Suleiman alMuslim

    Bismillah…

    Assalamualaikum wa Rahmatullah…

    I second sidi Maghi85’s point as I have heard this from many people who have stuidiied in Tarim. Personally I beleive that the author of SalafiBurnout is spreading clear lies, at least about Tarim where he slandered all the Habaib. I shall not be re-posting it as I will have sinned like-wise if I were to do that…

    With such dishonesty, I don’t think it is worth visiting his site. There is no benefit to it whatsoever.

    Please keep me in your duas,

    Wassalam

  • muriduahmadi

    Having ill opinions of the awliya is a sign of misfortune. May Allah protect us from it.

  • Pingback: Hit & Run Blogging « Izzy Mo’s Blog

  • NonMurid

    Bismillah.

    As a non murid living very close to Shaikh Nuh, I can make some observations which are, I suppose, more neutral and less biased in some ways inshallah. All the talk here about Kharabsheh is as though it’s a huge area. For those who haven’t been there, Kharabsheh consists of a few streets, of which even fewer are dominated by the Murid’s of Shaikh Nuh. This is in no way meant to take away anything from the Shaikh, but rather to give the readers some perspective about the area.

    These few streets are quite unique in the overall landscape as you see his murids; and other students of knowledge; bustling around in their various daily activities. Its impossible to police all of their activities, and no doubt, murid’s of Shaikh Nuh should be doing the policing rather than be in need of it, if they have been genuinely affected by his tarbiyah.

    Shaikh Nuh is well respected in the local area and the mosque he frequents and I have had the honour of meeting him in private. He is very hospitable, humble and possesses all the traits of a truly God fearing man. Based on this alone; just on a ‘muslim to muslim’ level; I would defend him against all the allegations that have been made against him; as a fellow muslim brothers honour is my own; especially when you have experienced that muslims character first hand.

    As is with human nature, we one becomes part of a group, one gets very focussed on internal issues which inevitably skews ones perception of the actual reality which exists ‘out’ of the comfort zone, namely Kharabsheh and Shaikh Nuh. Jordanian society is just as bad/good as any other ,and needless to say, people take the Tariq to find a solution ‘through’ this socio-religious cocktail we call life and to get to know their creator. No one is perfect and no one ever said Shaikh Nuh was or is, nor that his murids were or are.

    I think it’s also important to remember that Kharabsheh is not some divinely protected area where sins do not happen and that it is some spiritual refuge protected from all evil. The spiritual path which Shaikihs Nuh’s murid’s take, should create this spiritual refuge wherever they are, which can surely only come about when one is a living, breathing version of their teachers and masters. Of course suhba is a great thing and many murids do use Kharabsheh as a spiritual retreat, but if they only go there for these purposes and go back as they were when they arrived, they are surely missing the essence of Tassawwuf, which is change.

    As Shaikh Nuh so eloquently put it (a statement from one of his teachers) Tassawuf is like your arm i.e. it should be something practical which leads to change. I’m no teacher of the subject and will stop lecturing here and leave that to those qualified to do so.

    Lies, allegations, slander, backbiting are all haram people, whether you are a murid or not. Let’s put our own houses in order first before rampaging through the houses of those who Allah has blessed with knowledge of His deen. This applies to all muslims; in particular those accusing Shaikh Nuh of exhibiting that which is unbecoming of a Shaikh; and also to all murids/ex murids with their dealings with each other, other muslims and even scholars who disagree with their approach.

    Let us lead by example and show society what being muslim really is, so that our actions speak louder than the words of the forces who are looking to destroy us.

    Ameen.

  • maaqib

    as salaamu alaykum

    i know im a bit late but at the beginning of the article you mentioned al-yaqoubi. it would be interesting if your version of events on his scandal is similar to what i have heard…

  • http://www.blogistan.co.uk/blog/ Indigo Jo

    Wa alaikum as-Salaam,

    I don’t have a “version of events” regarding what happened with Shaikh Yaqoobi because I wasn’t there and wasn’t part of his group. I only know what I’ve heard and can’t vouch for the veracity of any of it.